On the Road Again

"On the road again.  Just can't wait to get on the road again." -Willie Nelson

 

My husband may somewhat agree with the lyrics to this famous song.  He likes being on the road working and taking on the challenges of new work projects and seeing new scenery, but I was not agreeing with Willie on Tuesday morning.  My husband was leaving to Texas.  Do you know how far away it is?  Really far!  To be exact, it is just over 1,000 miles depending on which route you take to the little Texas town of Panhandle.

 

Since the last time we were in Texas, which was almost 4 years ago, we have been very blessed by having Craig on projects close to home.  So far, since buying our home, the furthest he has been away is 8 hours.  But this time, it is completely across the country and it will take me more than a days drive to go and see him if I choose to.  Or if there is some sort of emergency, he can't just drop everything at the drop of a hat and be here in a short amount of time.  Even if he were to fly, the closest airport with a direct flight to the cities is a 4 hour drive, plus a 2 hour flight, plus a 2 hour drive home from the airport in the cities.  So it would take a minimum of 8+ hours if everything went smoothly and a flight was leaving the exact moment he arrived at the airport.  Slight panic mode!  Ahhh!

 

This project has been a long time coming and we have a lot of emotions invested in it already.  Shortly after finding out we were expecting a baby, Craig received his project assignment to go to Texas.  Now I can't remember exactly when he received it because my pregnancy was awful, always feeling sick, super tired...you know, all that fun stuff, but we were told he would be heading down May 6th.  Now to the average person, this would be ok, but hello!  I was pregnant!  My husband was leaving, I was sick, would he make it back for labor/delivery, etc.  And of course emotions were every which way on the chart.  So there were a lot of tears and sleepless nights.  But, I prayed, because what else is there to do and who else to trust than God.  He has it all planned out, right?  Right!  Well, as that start date inched closer, it changed.  He was then going to leave the first week of June.  Perfect!  Well, kind of.

 

If it was the first week of June, Hunter would be out of school for the year and we could just move down with the boys bringing air mattresses, clothing, a few toys (boys need their toys), the pack and play and just kind of rough it.  That would give us the summer together, he could be at the hospital when our little girl arrived, we would have another month together after she was born and we would head back to MN once school began.  Yes, I realize this was a little crazy and not sure if I would have gone through with it, but in my mind I was thinking we would have two little Texans.  But then, plans changed.  Good grief, quit playing with my emotions and plans!  I'm a planner!!!

 

So, the start day moved to just after the 4th of July.  Ummmm...I'm pretty sure his boss forgot I was due July 23rd!  So what, go to Texas for a couple weeks only to come home for me to have a baby (if we were lucky) and Craig was planning on staying home for 2 weeks once Finley was born.  I made Craig remind his boss (who has no wife or kids as of yet) of our situation.  Not that it really mattered.  He kind of laughed it off when Craig would remind him.  Craig told me that he told him that if the project was pushed back that late then he wasn't going to Texas until our daughter was born.  I reminded Craig that it wasn't up to him to call the shots, but he assured me it would be ok.  So, I continued to pray that God would work everything out time wise and that Craig would get his way. 

 

Well, the 4th came and went and the project wasn't going to begin until August 1st.  Woohoo!  We kept buying ourselves sweet, sweet time.  But his boss told him we needed to have the baby July 17th so Craig could take his two weeks off and return to work the 1st of August.  Hey buddy, you can't just plan like that unless you're having a C-section.  But guess what, he got his way!  On July 17th, we welcomed our beautiful little girl, Finley Kaisa, into the world.  I was a little upset that he got his way, but was so happy to be done with  my pregnancy and have my daughter in my arms. 

 

Let me tell you, two weeks flies by.  It is gone in the blink of an eye.  A few days before the 1st, Craig called his boss to nail down his return date.  I overheard the conversation and Craig told his boss I was having a hard time about him going back to work (I was actually ok with it and ready to take on the challenge) so was wondering if he could just stay home over the rest of the week (the 1st was a Wednesday) and start the next Monday, the 5th.  His boss was ok with that since during Craig's time away from the office, the project had been pushed back once again (the owner was having troubles getting all the financing in order).  Woohoo!  We bought ourselves more time together.

 

Well, the 4th came and he went back to the cities not knowing when he would head to Texas.  It could be in the next couple of days or it could be the following week.  Still so many unknowns.  Seriously, some days his job is worse than the military in that sense.  Waiting, waiting and then boom!  You have to move in a day or two.  Anyways, he went back to the office and still waited.  In the meantime, they gave him a raise and a promotion and a company vehicle, so we can't complain too much, but still didn't know.  Finally it was decided he would leave MN on September 3rd and begin work on the 5th.

 

Leading up until the day, I was struggling.  I knew it was real this time.  We had been blessed with many extra days together.  Everything worked out perfectly and we knew that he would eventually head to Texas.  But really, the first day of school AND my post-baby Dr. appointment day?  I guess it could have been worse, but I knew emotions would be high that day!  The weekend before was really busy, but really fun.  We spent time with friends and enjoying our family.

 

The 3rd came.  We got our 1st grader ready for school and sent him off on the bus.  He wasn't eager to go, but thankfully had a great first day!  Then after sending him off, it was time to say good-bye.  Ugh.  I will be honest and say I was very emotional, begged him to stay (which I always do), but in the end, let him go.  But not without a picture in is fancy cowboy hat and new truck.  After all, he was going to Texas!  Yee-haw!  He got into his truck after one last hug and kiss and I told him how proud I was of him.  I said good-bye and went inside with two kids waiting for me.  I quickly put on the game face shortly after we waved good-bye.  Honestly, it's not going to do me or my family much good to sit here and dwell on the fact that Craig is not at home with us.  Instead, we need to be thankful that he has a job.  A job that pays well, has great perks and benefits and most importantly, allows me to stay home with the kids.

 

Life on the road is not easy on any of us.  The boys struggle-especially Hunter.  He knows how life used to be having Craig around all the time.  But, Craig has prepped him and Hunter goes into a mode where he acts as if he is the man of the house.  He helps, he takes care of either Brody or Finley if I'm tending the other.  He has had to make supper, especially when I was super sick with the pregnancy.  The kid can make a mean Eggo waffle. ;)  And even with all that, he remains super sweet and loving and is so thankful for everything he has. Brody doesn't like it, but tolerates it because this is what we have done his entire life.  He doesn't know it any other way.  There have been times where he has punished Craig for being gone and won't give him the time of day, but right now that little boy loves his daddy more than you will ever know!  He is all over him when Craig's around and is constantly giving hugs, love and "too many kisses" (his version of a kiss attack).  Finley, well she doesn't notice yet.  We now have iPhones so our hopes are to FaceTime and for her to see Daddy while he is on the road so she doesn't forget him or his voice.  It will kill me and I'm sure Craig, if he comes home for a rotation and she doesn't want him or his scared of him.  And me, well I don't like it, but I tolerate it.  I put on this tough girl act but inside my heart aches and I miss him more than words could ever describe.  He knows it too, but I need to stay strong and to the outside world, I am, but to him, I'm real.  But in the end, I'm proud of him and thankful to have a husband who is willing to sacrifice time away from the family in order to provide.  Thankful for being able to stay home with our three kids and not miss out on their lives because trust me, they grow fast.  In the end, I think Craig has the short end of the stick.  He's not the one having fun with the kids.  Instead he is working long hours.  He's missing out on the little things that add up to the big things.  But for now, this is what we're doing and it works.  It's not easy, but it works.  And that's ok for now.  Ideally, we would love to be together, but for now we will make it work the best we can and enjoy every ounce of our time together. 

 

So in the end, we are living life apart again.  He is "on the road again".  His trip down went great, he's excited to be there and we are excited to see the project through pictures and hear about all of his adventures.  And the plus side, he will fly home next week. :)  I'm starting up this blog again to try my best to put the "little moments" on here in case I forget to tell him during our conversations in the evening.  So get ready for more updates on three adorable kiddos as we experience life on the road again.

 

Here are a couple pictures of Craig before hitting the road:

 

 Don't Mess with Texas.

Away he goes!  

Happy Valentine's Day!

 

These two cuties want to wish you a Happy Valentine's Day!

 

(And are you really surprise Brody has a Thomas V-Day shirt?  Thanks for coming through Target!)

Adios First Trimester!

Today officially marks the first day of my second trimester and I am so excited and relieved.  It means I am already 1/3 of the way done with this pregnancy (holy cow it's flying by!!) and hopefully means I am done with this miserable first trimester.

It started out great.  We found out that we were expecting Baby Z #3 on November 26th.  We decided that we wanted to wait to tell family and friends that we were expecting just to make sure everything was going ok and the risk of a miscarriage is significantly higher in the first trimester.  We decided that we would wait until Christmas and do something fun to break the news.

So, things started out great.  I was feeling amazing, full of energy, excited for about two weeks.  Then morning sickness hit and hit hard.  I could hardly eat, drink, was tired 24/7.  I knew I couldn't last until Christmas feeling like this.  So we called our family and close friends and broke the news.  I needed back up with Craig constantly on the road for work.  Of course everyone was ecstatic, and a bit shocked.  (We really thought we were done, but God has bigger and better plans for us.) 

Two days before my first dr. appt. I couldn't take it anymore.  I had been sick for about a week and was already down 5 pounds.  The house was a disaster because I was literally on the couch or in bed for about a week straight.  My sister was amazing and would come and catch up on dishes and my brother would bring us supper and get the boys ready for bed.  They were and are my little helpers and I am so thankful to be living so close to them.  I would also bring Brody over to my dad's from time to time just so I could sleep.    So...I called the doctor's office and talked to the nurse.  She prescribed me some meds and I was pumped.  I picked them out and then, luck would have it, felt amazing without taking them.  Seriously?  But the next day it set in again.  So I got the pills out, took one and pretty much instantly fell asleep, but wouldn't allow myself to fully fall asleep because I have a three year old running around.

Well, I slept more than I thought I did.  And it was for four hours.  And it was time to take another pill.  I got up and realized Brody had a hay day spreading crackers and cereal across the living room and kitchen floor.  I know he was just helping himself to a snack, but it was really bad.  So I took another pill and instantly got really lethargic.  I then knew I would never ever take that pill again if I wanted my kids to live.  Otherwise I probably would sleep 22/7.

I went to my first appt. December 6th and everything went well.  Got to see baby (well, honestly I didn't see it.  I could see the sac, but as far as seeing a baby...I felt like Rachel on the episode of friends where she doesn't see it.)  Heard the strong heartbeat-172!  And got a due date of July 23rd.  She also prescribed me some other meds.

The new meds were working amazing!  I could eat, but not a ton.  Throwing up lessened.  I was still tired, but not to the extent of sleeping all day long.  I was able to enjoy a long weekend trip to Arizona to visit family and survived the holidays...barely.  I was exhausted and the exhaustion set into full blown morning/all day sickness again.  Thankfully Craig was home over Christmas break and entertained the boys and I did a lot of sleeping.

This lasted for about 2 weeks and I went to my next appt. on January 3rd.  Baby was still growing and looked like a baby!!  You could see the spine and little hands waving around and the heartbeat was a strong 171!  It was very exciting and she said that at my next appointment, if baby cooperates, we may be able to find out what baby is!!  Next appointment date: January 31st!!  Kind of crazy, but exciting!  Anyways, she said the morning sickness will continue strong for the next week or two and hopefully simmer down after week 12 of being pregnant. 

Well, the weekend passed.  We went to church followed by a potluck and meeting.  We got home and I was feeling off.  I was waiting for my meds to kick in, but it wasn't happening.  I laid down on the couch, tried napping but felt uncomfortable.  Craig packed up to head back to his project and I told him he really shouldn't leave because I didn't feel good.  But, I knew that wouldn't work.  But, then about 15 minutes after he left, I was sick.  Like I had the flu type of throwing up.  I called my brother to see if he could bring supper and put the boys to bed.  He agreed and I laid on the couch.  And then when he got here made my way to bed.  But was up every 45 minutes or so and was throwing up violently until 5:00 AM.  I tried drinking water but it would not stay down at all.  I felt weak, tired (I didn't sleep all night) and super dehydrated.  I finally was able to fall asleep after 5:00 but woke up at 6:45 to the alarm clock to get Hunter up and ready for school.  I called the clinic at 7:00 to talk to the nurse, but they didn't open til 7:30.  I managed to get Hunter ready for school and send him on his way.

I finally got a hold of a nurse and they said to come into the clinic at 9:30.  I called my parents and my mom came out to watch Brody and my dad said he would bring me in.  I was in no state to drive.  I managed to get dressed and throw my hair in a pony tail.  After checking on baby at the clinic it was decided that I would get IV's.  So, I told my dad that it would take at least another hour. 

I took a little rest while they got everything situated and then began my IVs.  I felt a little better and super hungry.  She told me that I would want to eat right away and should because odds of it staying in were better since I had fluids in me now.  1 liter later, I was on my way to get more anti-nausea meds and some Dairy Queen.  I had about 2 bites of my sandwich and 3 of my blizzard and thought it was the most disgusting food I had ever ate.  I came home and napped the day away.

And the next day too.  My in-laws came out and made supper and helped take care of the boys one evening which was so nice.

Finally by Thursday I was starting to get a little better.  And at 10:00 Thursday night I was so hungry I grilled myself a burger on a George Foreman.  It tasted amazing.  And since then I have been feeling good as long as I stay on my meds.  I have gradually weened myself down to 2 pills a day vs. 3 which is so nice.  And today....drum roll please...I made it the entire day with no meds!!!  Hello, Second Trimester!!  It is so nice to see you and finally have some relief!!!  (Although will this mean that the friends who have been calling me Duchess due to similar symptoms will stop?  Probably not...we are both due in July.   ;))

Now, I am hoping this wasn't a fluke and it continues and the next 3 months are a breeze.  The past month and a half have been exhausting and not so much fun, but it's been a wonderful diet.  Down 12 lbs.-that's surviving the holidays!  I can only imagine what it would be like if I wasn't on any meds.  But I know it will be worth it in the end and will do anything it takes to make a healthy little baby.  And I know that eventually the weight gain will increase and that's ok.  As long as baby is growing and is healthy and I am too, that is what matters.

Here is to week 13.  The first day of my second trimester.  Baby is the size of a peach.  Bones, fingertips, veins and organs are starting to form.  And baby is moving its arms and legs around-which I can't wait to feel!!

3-D

The boys love going to movies!  It is a special treat that we do now and then and today I decided that we should go.  I have never been brave enough to take the two of them on my own (I'm kind of a chicken at times), but for some reason I was feeling a little spontaneous today and decided to give it a go.
The boys did awesome!  I was a little hesitant about going because the movie I wanted to go to, Hotel Transylvania, was only in 3-D at the 4:00 matinee.  But, Hunter assured me it would be ok and that the glasses over glasses wouldn't be a problem and Brody would probably keep them on.  I figured that you never know until you try.
After buying a big bucket of popcorn, a bag of M&M's and a pop for me, we found our way to theater 6.  Brody kept the glasses on for about the first 1/3 to 1/2 of the movie and then took them off.  The slight blurriness of the picture without the glasses didn't seem to bother him.  And Hunter loved the 3-D effect.  There were times he would reach out to try to touch the picture coming at him.
It was a fun afternoon and now I know that we can do the movies with just me and 3-D is ok too!!  Thanks for a fun afternoon, boys!

"I want oil."

 

The other day, Brody was standing by the lazy susan cupboard saying, "I want oil.  Pleeeeeeaaassse.  I want oil."  Well, we do keep our cooking oil there and I couldn't understand why he wanted oil so bad.  Seriously, I thought there was something wrong with my child.

 

Throughout the day he continued to go over there and telling me he just wanted some oil.  Finally, he gave up on me and brought a bar stool over to the corner in the kitchen, climbed up, opened the cupboard and pulled out the Oreo's!  "I want oil!"  Ahhhh....the boy wants an oreo! 

 

I caved and shook my head because Craig had been "sneaking" Oreo's the weekend before.  Thanks love for giving away my hiding spot and showing our kids it's ok to stuff an entire Oreo into your mouth because that way no one even notices you have one.  Wrong...you're busted. ;)

 

But seriously, look how cute this little man is with his oil Oreo.

 

Chuck Norris

Craig has noticed that Hunter has one of the same bus drivers that he had when he was a child.  The bus driver who looked like Chuck Norris.  I thought there was no way this guy really looked like him.  Ok, maybe a little.  But still.  So, I put it to the test.
I did a Google image search for Mr. Chuck Norris and called Hunter over to the computer.  I asked him who it was and his response, "Hey! That's my bus driver!"
Ha!  So it is true.  Who knew that Chuck Norris lived in a little town in MN.  Ok, so just his look-a-like does.

I made it!

Whew.  I made it.  Last week was exhausting and overwhelming on so many levels and I'm so glad that it's over and done with.  And it feels good.

Monday, we went to the wake of Craig's best friend's grandmother.  It is always hard to see people you care about hurting due to the loss of a loved one.  I am so glad we were able to go and support Ryan, during his time of need, and remind him that we will be there whenever he needs us just like he has been there for us and our family.  The evening ended with us going out to eat with two other couples who are really good friends from college.  It was great catching up with them on an unexpected trip to the cities.

Tuesday was a big day that I was excited for and dreading for quite some time now-Hunter's first day of Kindergarten.  He was really excited for it and I was really nervous like most moms are.  With the death of Ryan's grandma, Craig was able to be home for this day which was so nice.  The night before we were talking and I had a good long hard cry with him consoling me.  It is still so hard to believe that our little boy is going off on his own now and that he is growing up and there is absolutely nothing we can do to stop it.  It is heart breaking.  I really wish they could stay little.  Well, as I was saying, he was excited.  He woke up great, had breakfast, took some pictures, got a little interview on the video camera from him.  The morning was going perfect, except those tears that would come from nowhere.  Well, as time ticked away, I knew we were getting close to the big yellow bus coming.  15 minutes before the pick-up time I asked Craig if I should take him down the road.  He told me to settle down, relax and that it would be pointless to wait there.  Ok, he was right I thought.  So, then 5 more minutes passed.  I was ready to take him but Craig once again convinced me to hang out for a few more minutes otherwise we would wait forever down at the stop.  Well, after 2 minutes passed, my nerves got the best of me.  It was time to go.  Craig still thought I was a little paranoid, but I didn't care.  So we were off.  Hunter's bus stop is about 5 houses down the road from us, so a good walk.  We were one house down the street and that bus showed up.  Panicked, we both started to run.  Thankfully the driver saw us, hit the brakes and waited.  No good-bye hug, no good luck, just running, panicked that Hunter would miss the bus for his first day of school.  Well, I started the tearful walk back to the house.  My husband greeted me and asked what bus I sent Hunter on.  Uh....I don't know, the one that is supposed to pick him up.  It said on his schedule it's supposed to be bus 18, not 52.  What?!?!  I just sent my kindergartner on the wrong bus his first day of school?!?  I felt awful!  The tears turned into sobs.  So, Craig told me he would go to the school to make sure Hunter made it.

About 15 minutes passed and he returned.  He told me that no bus 18 showed up and if bus 52 did, it made it to the school before he did.  I said, well you did check his classroom to make sure he made it, right?  I'm pretty sure that's what moms would do.  Nope.  Why would he do that?  Ahhh!!  So at this time I'm freaking out that I don't know where my son is.  The issue could have been resolved so easily and I am mad.  Craig called transportation, but they weren't really sure.  So then he called the school and the secretary checked his room and he made it.  I'm pretty sure the extra 15 minutes of stress, crying, worry, fear...you get the point...could have been avoided if Craig would have just checked.  But really, then we wouldn't have this really cool story.  And the best part is, Hunter has no clue that we thought we sent him on the wrong bus.

I went to visit a friend and her new baby girl that morning and then had lunch with another friend.  The perfect thing I needed for one of the most stressful days of my life.  But really, look how cute this kindergartner is. :)

{Love Pinterest ideas.}

 

Wednesday the house seemed quiet with only one son.  No fighting, no wrestling matches and a sweet little Brody all to myself.  That evening we had supper at Craig's grandparents and I also had a meeting at church since I will be a counselor for our Sr. High Youth which I'm super pumped about.  So, not a stressful day, just a little busy in the evening and bedtime for the boys.

 

Thursday, Brody and I went shopping in town in the morning.  It was so nice and relaxing and he did great!  We even went to Culver's for a little lunch date.  That evening I went to a wake for my aunt's boyfriend of 12 years who became a part of our family.  My dad watched the boys and I took my mom with me.  After the prayer service, my mom, cousin and I went out for supper since I was starving!  Turns out we sat at the table right next to my mom's cousin who just got into town for the funeral the next day.  We chatted, laughed, heard some great stories of their youth, caught up on life and before we knew it, it was after 9!  And we still had an hour drive ahead of us.  We decided to scoot and head home.  But once I got home, the night was not over.  My aunt had asked me to write the eulogy for the funeral.  Nothing like waiting until the last minute, huh?  So, at 11 PM I started it and finished around 11:30, called my aunt with the final product and finally got ready for bed after midnight.  Exhausted.

 

Friday morning I had a little boy who did not want to go to school.  He hated it, never wanted to go back, didn't understand why he has to be there 7 hours and so on.  Many many many tears came out of that little boys big brown eyes that morning.  I had to literally push him out the door for the bus and walked him down and it took a lot of convincing to get him to go on the bus.  He was not happy with me at all.  Finally, he was off (in tears) and I had to quickly finish getting ready to head to the funeral. 

 

We made the hour drive and were greeted by family.  It is always hard to say good-bye to people and see those you care and love hurt so much.  After a great lunch of BBQ ribs to celebrate Greg's life, we came back home to get that little kindergartner off the bus.  Then, that night we had a get together with people from church.  The kids were having a pizza party and the adults were going out for supper and drinks.  It was a great night with great people!  But, I was tired after a busy week and organizing the event and knowing I had a big day coming up on Saturday.

 

{Yay for friends and matching drinks!}

 

Saturday morning came and Hunter and I were at City Park just after 6AM to set up for the 3rd annual CHD walk in Alexandria.  We got things set up for the walk, then participated in the walk and then it was time to say good-bye which was heart breaking.  Hunter was exhausted and overwhelmed from a busy week.  We were gone Monday, first day of school Tuesday, Craig leaving Tuesday, a new schedule, Friday night not with me and now I was leaving him for the rest of the day and night.  I do not blame him for being crabby, tired and upset.  If I had the stress level that he had for the week, I would be mad too.  So, many tears and hugs and much convincing, Craig's sister was kind enough to take the boys to Grandpa and Grandma's so I could go to a bachelorette party!  I was excited, but everything hit me.  I had a big break down and cried really hard for about an hour.  I felt like a horrible mom, I felt overwhelmed.  I was exhausted and yet I still had more to do.  So, after a little pep talk from my amazing husband, I got myself together and got ready for a fun night.

 

{Brody and I at the Heart Walk}

 

The beautiful bride-to-be and me road tripped the hour down to the hotel that we would be staying at.  We checked in and found our sweet suite.  Two levels and all!  We had a blast heading out for supper, a quick stop at Old Navy (who doesn't go to ON on the bachelorette party night?), and played some games at the hotel before heading out for a night of bar hopping, making new friends, laughing and having fun.

 

{Photo booth props are a must for bachelorette parties.}

 

Phew!  It was a crazy week and I'm so glad it is over.  There were a lot of good things about it, but it was just busy.  There was no planning ahead for the activities.  I just had to take them as they came.  I'm ready for fall and the slower pace of life.  Thank you Lord, for helping me make it through.